My Zen · The Mollie Chronicles

The Workaholic in Me

Yes its true. My name is Mollie. And I have been a workaholic since I was 16 years old.

That is almost 10 years. 

At first it was about making extra cash. I was in high school and I wanted to buy a car, go to the movies, but clothes, etc. So I worked. For $5.25/hour back then. It seems strange that its now 10 years later and I am making some serious career wage. 

In college I kept at it. I felt like I needed to. I grew up in a family that provided me with what I needed, but couldn’t afford the extras in life, like a smartphone, a new car, my own apartment and finally student loans. So I worked my way through school. Having a social life wasn’t really an option. I went to Nursing school full-time and worked nearly full-time. I LOVED it! I always felt busy and I thrived on having a long to-do list. 

The first 24 years of my life seemed to fly by. Time moves really quickly when you are scheduled down to every minute of every day. Now I am in my career job, typically working 2-3 days a week (very part-time) and picking up any possible shifts I can…because that is what I’m used to. As if that isn’t enough, I teach fitness classes at least twice a week, also filling in where I can. I am confident that it isn’t healthy, but it makes me happy. Or at least I think it does. 

Just like anyone would, I get really overwhelmed at times. As I am growing more into my role as an adult, a career woman, an aunt, sister, friend, fitness instructor and more, I fear I am not giving the different areas of my life as much focus as they deserve. Sometimes the activities I have always loved feel like tasks on my to-do list instead. And they shouldn’t . 

The world moves so quickly that it is really difficult to take a step back. It is hard to allow a few hours every day to do the things you love. Especially for someone who thrives on work. And not difficult in the way that there is no time. But difficult in the sense of feeling guilty for taking that time to not “accomplish” something. Isn’t spending time with family an accomplishment? Isn’t reading a good book an accomplishment? How about writing this blog or spending the day baking? 

I say, who cares if you don’t pay that bill today? It will still be there tomorrow. The house will still need to be vacuumed tomorrow. But taking the opportunity to do something you love? Explore a beautiful place outdoors? Have lunch with your best friend? It might not.  

I don’t want to reach my retirement and realize I missed out on so many years with the people that matter to me the most. It is a struggle for sure, but I learn more everyday. We all need to learn to give ourselves a break and enjoy life along the way. Its not like we get a do-over. 

Sure, we need to work in order to survive in this world, but we don’t need to overwork just to have more money (I agree, I like the money cushion and I want to be debt-free), but I can’t let that run my life. 

As I have said, I am re-evaluating my life. Perhaps it is time to give something up? Perhaps it is just time to start saying “no” to extra shifts? Perhaps another relocation is in order. Life is changing everyday. Lessons are learned. Opportunities arise. We must pay attention and choose the path that makes us feel good. Feel happy. The path that when we look back in 50 years, we won’t have any regrets. I believe there are no wrong choices, but there are ones that can sidetrack us for a few moments in life. As long as we are happy, as long as I am happy, I think a little side-tracking is acceptable.

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